: Surgery -- another thought today

Wow, it was such a cathartic day when I was able to write out my emotions and see how long it took me--and what it took--to get back to that peaceful place. Phew, and then more and more keeps coming. This must be written in the stars to begin something new {or something very old that is needing a NEW approach perhaps}.

I felt so grateful in my last post to be alive and live to tell about the day. The week has gone on and a new feeling has washed over me.

For those who never my first post on heart surgery, my ribcage was not put together completely and is causing a constant irritation/pain when I breath deep, walk fast, burp, hiccup, sneeze, and basically....breath and live.
Surgeons and specialists have passed me from one to another, nobody wanting to take the lead, saying only surgery to reopen and try and close it again is the answer. My surgeon who did the work doesn't even know all this has happened. I'm sure if he new, he would care. So, here I am, two years gone by, realizing time's aren't a'changin' and I need to deal/cope/accept all of this. There is one guru in my life helping and that's my wonderful chiropractor; without him, I would have zero help... here's a beautiful continuation to help me grow and find PEACE {she's always hiding somewhere inside of me--you'd think I would remember that by now} Oi -- to be human!!

I woke up today and as I splashed water on my face, I looked down at my scar. I remembered how for most of my life, I had used my sexuality because that's what I had learned to do to be "loved" but once that scar appeared at such a young age {for me} -- I had to throw out my beautiful sexy dress I wore on special occasions. I had to adapt, which added to my already begun journey into true healing. I joked to myself that I would tell others I lost in a dueling sword match; yeah, a fencing match. That would be my fame. I never did use that story.

Even after my second surgery and years later, I sometimes feel uncomfortable but then, I remind myself that I AM alive. Today was beautiful. As much of my healing {spiritual and emotional} took place in the Middle East, my mind often goes there for interpretation. Today, I saw my scar as an Arabian woman's veil--hiding her/my true wounds or self or core of our essence underneath that visible scar... it was the invisible that would be either more painful or more joyous as moments tick by. For me, the moments have turned into hours into days into weeks into months into--well--infinity. How I would love to take the veils off of not only our Arabian sisters, but each of us who veils and hides what's beneath the scar...

And just under my veil, I suddenly imagined my ribcage as a huge gate into a mansion; in essence, making me the gatekeeper, inviting in whatever energy I chose to see what lays beneath her mysteries. The gate is slightly open, allowing for one's eye to peak through the gap and see inside... the majestic mountains {you say mountains, I say lungs}, the beautiful streams, waterfalls, and rivers {you say blood flow and arteries, I say flowing chi / water {life force}.... As your pupils adjust to peaking through the small hole in the CENTRE of the ribcage/gateway... you see a beautiful, pulsating, heart-shape, seemingly the core to all of the other movements--the maestro who keeps the tempo, the rhythm, the BEAT... on and on and on--to the rhythm of life itself.

Oh, how I love healing... as it is late, I'm suddenly thinking Shakespeare {I think}--it's time for beddie bies to sleep, per chance to dream -- Good Nite Peoples of the World
Namaste